It's Friday. Sex?
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
