do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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