I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize