We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
