i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize