i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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