I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
