Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
