Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
