I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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