i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
