weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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