I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
