So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
