my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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