Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
