i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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