He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
