My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize