Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
