hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
