I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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