hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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