I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
