You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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