it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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