NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
We need to get me chipped asap
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
