he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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