Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Randomize
