i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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