i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize