fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
