sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
