would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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