If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
