Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I deserve this hangover.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
