The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
