How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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