I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i think my tv is drunk
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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