Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize