man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
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