I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
