I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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