4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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