where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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