Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
