is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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