Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
