after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
my poor anus
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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