So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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